Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Stupid You

Like I said, I really want to steer away from my posts being deemed “The Break-up Chronicles”, however can we really pretend that I’m not dealing with a break-up? Well, I tried. And the verdict is: A big resounding NO…so, let’s think about the things I write as “The Things I’m Learning Chronicles”. Not as catchy, huh? Oh, well.

 

So, I may share a thing or two with you randomly as I fight for my ever loving sanity journey through the hard days.

 

Today, I want to share this: Beware of the “stupid you” when under copious amounts of emotional stress. I can’t tell you how many times I have said, “Who are you?” to myself over the past few weeks. The things I think, the things I do, the things I say are just down right foreign to me some moments. They are not all bad. I’m finding out that I desire certain things and believe things that I didn’t realize before, but along with the good there comes bad; And I’m realizing how rotten I am. There have been so many times I have had a “screw it all” attitude and just wanted to plunge head first into an ocean of sin, because it’s easier to do that than to fight. And though, I haven’t plunged, I have dangled my toes…okay, maybe even waded knee deep in the “I have been done wrong and I deserve to do this pool”. No, this is not where I beat myself up. We are all sinners…It’s just amazing how much Satan still kicks you as hard as he can, even when you’re already on the ground.

All I know is that I ‘m so thankful for my friends, because they have wrapped their arms around me, even when I have not been very welcoming; I’m also completely floored by the fact that I have parents who are so loving and forgiving. My mother has been the most understanding soul through all my crazy, un-like me behavior. Most gals would probably be afraid to show their face at the homestead after being the ugly person I have been the past few weeks, but I’m so unbelievably blessed with a home that delivers the love and forgiveness that our Savior extends to us.

Truth:

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I don’t condone purposely going out to make mistakes, but the following is something that I am having to accept because what is done is done:

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And just let me throw this out there: Another option is you can also be young and smart by listening to the wisdom of those who have been somewhere, you just really don’t ever want to be.

Still doing okay, Reader-Friends; Love to you all.

2 comments:

Nicole said...

That last little part is so true. We don't always have to take the hard road. Keep surrounding yourself with encouraging people. Let them keep you accountable! I am so proud of you. The Lord is using your words so much in my life. Thank you, friend! Love you!

Unknown said...

I know that girl!!! Ha